The Mazoku Hunter
by Xee Metallium
Summary: mazoku chaos, Fluffy the wolf... Sherra, Xelloss, Zelas, Gaav, Phibby, val, you name the mazoku, they live here!


**Disclaimer n' stuff: **

Well, it's pretty typical of me.  I have some ideas for a fic and wanna write them out as soon as possible. I haven't got an idea for an intro I'll write it later. 

(promise)

 anyway, I don't own any of theses creatur… uh… characters. Most of them belong to someone with an imagination equal to if not greater than mine. I'm so jealous…. Etc…etc…blah blah blah…

**The Mazoku Hunter**

"Hi Folks, ex-crocodile hunter here on the trail of one of the worlds' most  fierce and elusive creatures. The Mazoku. Now we're going to land this Helicopter on the island and cover it up with leaves so the li'l critters don't see it. They're quite mischievious and noisy fella's, But you don't want to get on their bad side… now, I'm gonna set up a camera here and go huntin'!"

"Why? Why did you do that?! Never mind just go away."

"Why are we here?"

"Go. Away. Xelloss." Sherra and Valgaav snapped, looking up from their card game.

"Bugger off." Sherra muttered.

"And don't come back." Valgaav added.

"… I'm bored of talking to you two anyway."

"Barely a fun conversation" Valgaav said dryly as the purple haired mazoku stalked off.  "Stick or draw Sherra?"

"draw again."

"Well?"

"Hit me."

Valgaav couldn't resist it. He complied with her request.

"And another card please." Sherra added bitterly, rubbing her face.

"Well?"

"stick"

"okay. 21" Valgaav told her smugly. 

"Five card draw. So nyah on you." She replied. 

" mrrhhpphh……" Valgaav grumbled. "and you don't cheat. I hate your luck."

"Skill, Val Chan. Skill." Sherra chided him, with a smirk. "Sooooo, what shall we do now?"

"Feed Xelloss to Dolphin's pet shark?" Valgaav suggested as said mazoku breezed back in the room.

"Now what'd I do?" Xelloss asked, peeking at the results of their card game.

"Exist." Valgaav told him. "Get lost before I lose my rag."

"Oh no." Xelloss seated himself into Valgaav's lap. "No no no! I want to see you lose your rag" he smirked at Sherra, who was stifling a smile. 

Valgaav introduced Xelloss' head to the table several times then walked off angrily. Sherra followed before she could possibly become a victim of Xel-boredom herself.

"Now whatd'ya suggest to do?"  Sherra asked, joining Grou and Grau idly watching some Australian geezer jump out of his truck and wrestle a rather large, rabid looking wolf to the ground. "Eh, look at that idiot."

"Who knows what he might catch from… is that 'Fluffy'? … Well the guy is doomed to die of **something**." Grau said.

"It's not 'Fluffy'." Grou added. "Last time I saw '_Fluffy'_ it had a black bow tied around it's neck."

"I guess it's Wolfie then." Sherra suggested, as the Australian guy put the snarling beast in a headlock and began roughly brushing it's teeth.

"Wolfie? Who gave it that original and highly imaginative name then?" Valgaav asked.

"Ha-ou Sama of course!" Chorused the other three mazoku.

"Of course." Valgaav muttered darkly. "I should have been able to guess."

 "Now then, this fella has jaws strong enough to crush a thigh bone, would you look at that… Crikey! Here comes another one. Okay mate… run along now…" Steve Irwin dropped the tortured wolf, who was more than happy to run away,  and pounced on another small mangey white(ish) one, with red eyes…. And rabies. 

"That guy is so dumb." Grou commented. "Cottontail is sooooo diseased." 

"He should have put some gloves on at least." Sherra said thoughtfully, watching him wipe the froth off himself with one hand, holding cottontail by the scruff of the neck by the other.

"Who named that one?" Valgaav asked.

"Not Ha-ou sama!" Sherra, Grau and Grou replied in unison.

"I didn't think he did. The name is too…umm…too…"

"What you all looking at?" Xelloss asked, popping up between them and the window to watch the fight between Cottontail and Steve. 

"…Fruity." Valgaav finished. 

"That's not Fruity, that's Cottontail. Fruity is elsewhere."

"And just HOW many of these creatures did you name?" 

"Let me think…. Hmmmm…." Xelloss tapped his lips with one finger thoughtfully. "I named Fluffy one through Fluffy one hundred and eighty six. Fruity, curly, fuzzy, cottontail, fluffball, wizzer, widdles… fangy, droops, dribbles and dribbles two." 

"I see. Now go away."

"Oh you're nice."

Sherra nudged the two priests and whispered to them.

"I have a fool proof method for getting rid of it."

"Oh?" The both asked at once.

"Watch. Hey Xel, Juu-ou asked me to pass you a message." Sherra said.

"What was it?"

"She's got something she needs done as soon as possible. It's really important. Isn't it Grau, Grou?"

They nodded. 

"What? What?"

"Train Fluffy to jump backwards through a ring of fire juggling seven fireballs and 7 full red wine bottles performing a triple somersault and whistling breeze and then landing on his forepaws with his tail in the shape of a pentagram… In the cellar."

"She said that?"

Sherra nodded, keeping her face perfectly straight. The priests and Valgaav suppressed their grins and sniggers. 

"It sounded really urgent." Sherra prompted as the Xelloss shaped dust cloud dissipated slowly. "That'll keep him out of our hair until he realizes otherwise!" Sherra giggled, letting her serious face be taken over by hysterical giggles. The others were struggling to remain standing.

"Sherra, that was… class! If only… I'd thought of that… before!" Valgaav said, between panting for breath. 

They laughed a bit more, then sat down for a game of cards. They had their poker faces on for a while until…

"You seen Fluffy Sherra?" 

"No."

"Okay."  

Sherra grinned and went back to the game until….

"FLUUUUUUUUUUUUUUFFY!!!!!!!!!!!! HERE BOY!!" 

"What a gullable idiot." Valgaav said, looking across at the window, whilst Sherra leaned over and looked at the cards in his hand. 

"HEEEEEERE FLUFFY! FLUFFY-WUFFIE-KINS!! HERE  BOY!!"

"He gonna get yelled at in a minute." Grau remarked.

"Wanna bet on who? I bet Dynast-sama." Sherra said.

"I was going to say that!" Whined the two priests.

"I say Gaav-sama." Valgaav said.

"Well, then, I'll say… Zelas." Grau shrugged.

"Fine… I'll say Phibrizzo."

"FLUUUU….

"SHUT YOUR ANNOYING CAKEHOLE NOW!!"

"…ufy… ut oh."

"I win." Valgaav said smugly.

"Cakehole." Sherra snickered.

"What's wrong with saying 'Cakehole'?" Valgaav asked indignantly.

"Nothing." Sherra replied, after pausing for the scampering and explosion sound to die off. "It's just a um… strange… term of words."

"What's a 'term of words' anyway? You just invented that." Valgaav told her.

"You're right I did. So what?"

"NO YOUR FRICKEN FLUFFY IS NOT UNDER MY TRENCH!"

More scampering and explosion sounds ensued. The faces of the four playing cards could only be summed up in one way…. Which has yet to be invented.

"He didn't really look under Gaav's trench did he?!" Grau commented, eyes like saucers.

"Well, one things for sure. If he did, he'll never bother us again." Grou added.

Sherra sighed as she heard a whispered yell, if you can imagine that, for Fluffy. 

"No such luck."

"Now wait one minute!" Valgaav stood and slammed his fist on the table. "Looking under Gaav-sama's coat isn't going to kill anyone, unless Gaav-sama kills them for it."

"You'd know." Grau snorted.

"Hey!" 

"Who do you think will be next to yell?" Sherra asked.

"Gaav-sama's on the warpath. So I say Gaav-sama." Said Valgaav.

"Dynast-sama!" The two priests chirped at the same time, then glared at eachother.

"No. I'M saying Dynast-sama." Sherra sneered, getting ready to go into 'demon-head-shout-mode'

"Stupid witch." Grau whined. "Zelas then."

"Stubborn General." Grou grumbled. "Phibrizzo."

"Did you hide fluffy, Sherra?" Valgaav asked, raising one eyebrow.

"Hell no. I wanna see the wolf jump backwards through a ring of fire juggling seven fireballs and 7 full red wine bottles performing a triple somersault and whistling breeze and then landing on his forepaws with his tail in the shape of a pentagram… In the cellar." 

"Bet the cellar gets wrecked." Grau said.

"And we ALL know what's kept in the cellar." Sherra added. 

"That's cruel." Grou said.

"And?"

"I guess it's mild by your standards Sherra." 

Sherra smirked.

"We can't use this trick too often though." She chided. "Otherwise he'll catch on. At the moment though this is working a treat."

"And Just WHY do you have to CREEP past MY ROOM?" 

"I won that time!" Grou announced looking happy with himself.

"Oh REALLY?! WELL I'LL SORT HIM!" Sound of stamping followed this. "OPEN UP YOU BIG PALOOKA!"

"Palooka." Sherra sniggered. 

"What shall we do now?" 

"Train Fluffy?" Valgaav asked dryly.

More sniggers from the group. 

"Nah, let Xelloss do that. Wanna game of chess Grau?"

"Sure."

"AH SUCK IT UP SQUIRT!"

"WELL DON'T TELL EVERYONE I'M WATCHING BARNEY AND THEY HAVE TO CREEP PAST MY ROOM!" 

Sherra and the group giggled. 

"I WOULDN'T SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT! I CAN THINK OF BETTER INSULTS HELLBRAT!"

"SURE YOU CAN!" 

"he can." Valgaav said, with a nod and looking for anyone who dare argue with him. 

"Sure he can." Grau muttered, looking up as the sound of snarling came from outside. "Sounds like that idiot's at it again."

The group trotted over to the window. The guy was creeping up on Fluffy hefting a huge boulder.

"We're just gonna hit him with this rock… ohh… he's getting a little bit cranky…. Your alright mate… I'm not gonna hurt ya…. Crikey! Look at the size of those teeth… brilliant critter…"

"So that's where Fluffy got to."  Valgaav mused looking at the fight. 

"Crikey!!! The little B*****d bit my arm off!!"

"I'd get a tetanus and rabies shot for that one." Sherra said with a shrug, going back to her game of chess.

"Fluffy! Come out come out where ever you are!!"


End file.
